Oyibo

When I came to Lagos I came with a plane where there was a lot of white people on board. At the at the airport there were a lot of white.....but after that I do not know where they disappeared. Lagos is a big city, the biggest in Nigeria. Even when I asked honey how many live there he didn't know, and he said it is impossible to know, even if there are numbers, they are not correct. And I actually believe him! It is easy to calculate every person here when we have a different system. I will not compare the systems, as I know NOTHING of theirs, I still have a lot to learn about the country of my husband! And I love everything I know about it! Every country has it's good and it's bad. Taking all of Finlands population and but it on an area as big as Lagos and we will have problem here too....I suspect this area would be SO much more dangerous.....no doubt!

After I left the airport, I found and recognized my Honey so easily! I had been scared I would not. It had been so long....SO LONG! And people change, I sometimes miss my friends because they have changed something! Just recently I had a friend that cut his hair....I see him almost everyday! I talk to him almost every day!! And when I saw him I first recognized him, then I hesitated, I looked at him and I did not recognize him anymore, but I saw on his face that he recognized me so I had to act like nothing and just pretend that I wasn't totally amazed that I knew who he was, logically I knew, but my brain did not recognize him! If that can happen under a short period of time, what can not happen under 9 month?? I was so nervous, I was so scared! Not because I would be in a country that he claims is not safe, not because I would be the only white. Not even because I wouldn't recognize him right away, because I knew that if I don't he will. I AM the only white! So we will find each other. I was afraid I would not recognize him because I would feel so ashamed after and what would he think of the fact that his girlfriend couldn't recognize him? Oh my god! I don't even want to think about that! 

But I talked to him on phone, and I happened to look to the left, and I saw him! I SAW HIM! Not even the whole him, but a part of his face! And the happiness in me when I realized I do recognize him! I don't have to worry! Amazing! 

He took me to a taxi, we drove to the hotel, and after that I saw no white! I first didn't even realize that. It was when we went to a fast food place and he saw a girl that was white....he saw, not me, I then looked and realized that is true! She is light! I didn't say anything, cause I didn't think she was white, or I didn't have time to say anything before he turned to me and said no, she is not white, she is what we would call albino. I didn't ask what they call her.

They had a name for me, oyinbo, or how it is spelled. The name of the blog I found on wikipedia, but I have a small memory there should be an N somewhere....please feel free to correct me!

I heard that everywhere, even one of Honeys friends called me that when I talked to her on the phone. I learned to like that name. Even though it can be pronounced in a racistic way also, but I heard that only once. The women who passed me looked at me said something quick and ended with oyinbo, it sounded like she had something really ugly in her mouth that she really had to spit out so fast! I asked Honey what she said, but she didn't hear her. Or at least that is what he said... i don't think he would have translated it even if he would have heard her. But that is the only way I noticed any negative about being a oyinbo!

People wanted to greet me, they wanted to take pictures of me, they stared at me....well, I didn't notice the last one, but Honey told me every once in a while that he wish that they would just stop staring! I replied to him that I do not even notice, and he told me that is because I liked it! Lol! Well, the truth is probably closer to, I had other things to concentrate on, all new impressions, everything was new and exiting! Sometimes I just had to hold his hand so that I would not end up in a hole, because I was looking in a different direction!

They wanted to greet me, once Honey told me, "he is greeting you, say Dadani". So I did! And the person that was greeting me was surprised I answer in yuroba. But that is the thing! He asked me Bawonio? (I take no responsibility of my spelling!) They kept trying to speak yuroba to me! Sometimes I smiled, sometimes I answered are you sure?, sometimes I started to speak sweedish! Speaking sweedish immediately made them turn to english! Once when Honey talked to me in yuroba, just to amuse a personal at the hotel, I answered Kilonshile? ...Meaning "what is wrong with you"? Or "what happened".

About the only yuroba I actually know! But I think it is the best word/sentence I could possibly know....

Perspective and color

It has been almost a months since I was in Lagos. I still miss it everyday! I miss my husband also, but he is always in my heart and I talk to him everyday, so I do know that he is with me all the time. I do not miss him so much that it hurts....all the time, still I miss him that much sometimes.

When I was in Lagos I tried to write a blog or two, but it was impossible! What should I write about? Should I write about the fact that the roads were so bad I have never seen anything like it, and I can tell you that because that is what Honey told me when I arrived, he pointed it out two or three times and I got tired of it and told him I'm used to bad road! As he told me, that is bad roads in the countryside  this is the biggest city in the country....I had no answer to that! Or should I write about the fact that the cooling system in our hotel room was on so cold that I actually was freezing in Africa? Me and Honey was disagreeing on the perfect temperature of the room. Sometimes it was too cold for me, sometimes it was perfect for me, and a few times it even became too hot! And when that happened Honey pointed it out that NOW it becomes too hot!

I have so much fun with him! I can totally be myself! Some jokes I make he just hates, but I am starting to figure out when to shut my mouth, and sometimes he makes fun of me and I laugh at that, sometimes I don't like the jokes that he makes. But all and all, there is where I find the cultural differences! In the way to understand a joke! I told him as a joke that he can not do anything about my economic situation anyway and the answer I got instantly made me realize that it was NOT a joke I will ever bring up again! I can tell my friends the same, that they can do nothing about my economic situation, and they would just smile and that would be the end of it.

But now I have got a few questions from people that I have talked to when I got home from Lagos. I will take the one by one, if they keep coming!

How did it feel like when I stepped out to the airport after landing in Nigeria? Wow? I don't even know! I was finally there! I had my head full of the fact that I was missing an address of where I should stay, and what would I do instead. I had it on my e-mail. I asked the personal at the plane, they recommended me to talk to the immigration people....well, I would have to do that anyway! So I asked them, I said I can try and call Honey, so I did. It didn't go through! I tried again, it didn't work, so I told them it didn't work! I was thinking I could probably borrow their phone or something. They asked me to put his number down instead, so I did that! No problem!

I went through the last passport control just like that. Only a number and no address, no problem. I knew I could hire a trolley for my bags, I knew it was 100 naira. On the plain I had heard people talking about 150 naira, so I wasn't so surprised when the lady asked me for 50 naira more. I was only happy that I had enough naira with me. I had like 1200 naira, about 6 euro I think...... It felt safe having that amount, even though I know it sounds little. I knew I wasn't supposed to need more.

But talking about how I feel. I had an experience when I was in amsterdam. I was in the waiting area, it was almost empty, I went to the toilet, was strolling around and when I returned....where did all the people come frome? And not a single white? I usually don't see color. I can stand in a store with 3 personal, about 4 customers, where I am one and two are friends of mine and black! Yes, that happened to me when I got back from Lagos! When I stepped out of the store somebody was calling my name behind me, and I looked back and realized WE HAVE BEEN IN THE SAME STORE? I just told him, "How can I miss a black person here?" So I know I do not notice color. But when I realized I am the only white.....that was scary!

No, I was not scared to go into a country where I would be the only white. Never! It didn't even cross my mind! But standing outside the waiting area and realizing that, that was scary!

And how long did I have this feeling? For about as long as it took you to read the sentence above! I realized this is how black people must feel like when they enter Finland....then I went on a bench to sit and read. When I then entered the plane, there was like 40% white...? Where did they come from? I was so surprised!

It will never stop surprising me.....why do I not notice color??